If I Were A Girl
by Mickimomo
Summary: I'll admit it. I love Draco Malfoy. Problem. He hates me. I'm a boy. It won't work. I sat in the stands crying quietly. If I had a chance... just one day... I'd be able to confess... I'd be able to enjoy him... I'd be able to experience becoming one with him...and yes it would only happen once... But I'd be happy. I'd be so fucking happy. For that one day. (LEMON)
1. Chapter 1

_I'll admit it._

 _I love Draco Malfoy._

 **Problem.**

 _He hates me._

 _I'm a boy._

 _It won't work._

I sat in the stands crying quietly.

 _If I had a chance... just one day... I'd be able to confess... I'd be able to enjoy him... I'd be able to experience becoming one with him...and yes it would only happen once... But I'd be happy._

 ** _I'd be so fucking happy._**

 _For that one day._

I looked down at the field sadly watching the blonde zoom around furiously in a desperate attempt to catch the snitch while it was storming.

 **Idiot.** _You aren't supposed to practice in this kind of weather._

 _I was no better._

 _Sitting here quietly._

 _Lusting after him._

I looked down at the snitch in my hand.

 _Maybe I should go give it to him. He's probably pissed._

Sighing I got up and walked down the steps until I was at the edge of the booth.

He zoomed up then down then to the right then to the left.

" **HEY MALFOY!** "

His head whipped up at me and I waved him over.

He flew over to me and I shoved my hands in my pocket.

"Why are you here?"

"I was sitting here earlier thinking and then you popped up."

"Why didn't you leave?" he hopped off his broom and stood in front of me.

"I was still thinking."

"Idiot."

"Why are you playing Quiditch in the rain? You could lose the snitch."

A pained look crossed his face. "I know, but Quiditch is the only way I can vent. You know... the whole war thing has been tormenting me."

"At least it's over."

"Yeah." I mentally drooled when he wiped his bangs out of his face.

"So telling by the look you just gave me... You lost the snitch, didn't you?"

"..."

"Come on Malfoy... honesty is the best policy."

He shot me a glare. "You act as if you could possibly help me."

"I'm the best seeker at Hogwarts."

"Cocky much?"

I pressed myself against his chest and grinned. "Not really."

He shoved me back lightly and frowned. "I lost it. Now how are you going to help me find it?"

The distance between us hurt, but I'm pretty sure he picked that up as a 'I'm better than you' gesture more than a 'I like feeling you against me' one.

"How am I supposed to do that? It's raining."

"Damn it Potter!" he pushed me to the floor with one hard shove and climbed back on his broom. "You're wasting my time."

"No. Wait!"

" **WHAT?!** "

I know he's mad about the snitch being lost... and he's tired... and cold... and right now probably isn't the best time to torment him any longer, considering that he could get in stupid amounts of trouble for something as simple as losing the golden snitch while practicing while it was raining IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.

"Come here."

He growled and flew back towards me.

"I have a question..."

"What?"

"You broke up with Pansy right after the war... why?"

"I fell for someone else."

"Who?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like are they a guy or girl?"

His eyes widened. "If you're asking me if I'm gay I'm beating your arse with my damn broom."

"It's a yes or no question."

"Why? Are you bloody rainbows Potter? What is it? Do you have a crush on me?"

I felt a tear fall as his voice started to sound disgusted and full of hate. "I-..."

"Because if the answer is yes, you are literally screwing yourself. I won't ever see you more than a stupid boy who broke their own heart."

Another tear fell. "..."

"And I'd have to hate you and distance myself even more. I think that's sad. We just made amends, and you wanna go fucking everything up with your petty heart."

"I didn't even answer."

"Body language." he eyed me before wrinkling his nose.

I sighed in defeat. "So if I were born a girl... would you have even considered me?"

"It depends. If you were attractive and Slytherin or not."

I nodded. "Well... Uh... here." I stuck out my hand holding the snitch while crying in the rain. "I would be upset if you got expelled."

He snatched it away and disappeared into the distance on his broom.

" _Thank you..._ " I whispered to myself. "You're welcome." I mumbled before shivering back up the steps and inside the school.

I wobbled until I made it into the commons of Gryffindor. "Gah." I peeled off my jacket and looked around.

"Harry?" I heard a whisper.

"Yes?"

Hermione stepped out from the shadows in a nightgown. "Where were you? We were worried sick about you." she scanned me for a second before punching my arm. "Idiot! Were you outside?"

"Maybe?"

"Merlin, you're gonna catch a cold."

"Hey. Hermione... do you know any gender potions?"

"..."

"I need one that'll last a day."

"Harry... is this guy the reason why you broke up with Ginny?"

"Yes."

"Who is it?"

"Promise me you won't tell anyone?"

"Promise."

I cupped my hand over her ear and mumbled the blonde's name.

"Does he like you back?"

"He's being really cold right now."

"Well... I know a potion but it takes about a year to brew properly. So it's expensive. I know only one person who has a few vials to spare, considering that she doesn't prank anymore mean girls.

"Who?"

"Maria..."

"You mean that genius Ravenclaw girl who Fred and George are madly in love with because of her pranking skills?"

"Brown skin long black twists?"

"Yeah."

"Yup. You gotta ask her."

"Ughh."

"She's not as intimidating as she seems."

"I know... but I needed the potion now."

"Well go to sleep and I'll see what I can do."

I nodded at her and fled to my room with Ron, Neville, and Seamus.

I tiptoed to the bathroom and stripped. I showered and all of the above, then took two tylenols before jumping into bed.

A bright purple light caught my eyes.

I dug around in my sheets and grabbed the vial.

' **Take me when you are alone.**

 **Then come on out a girl not boy**

 **And hopefully you will use me right**

 **For only twelve hours can I bring your dream to light**.'

 _ **-Maria**_

I smiled. "Thank you."

I slid the glowing potion into my bag and turned over to face my dreamy wonderland.


	2. Chapter 2

_**The Next Day**_

I grabbed the vial, dropped it into my satchel before leaving the dorms. I noticed Maria walking down the hall towards me.

She grabbed my hand and lead me down a dark corridor.

We walked into an empty classroom and she looked around before locking the door and turning to face me.

"Alright. You vant to vee a girl?" she asked.

"Yes."

"It is not very easy. At virst, zat is. After a vhile, you may get zah hang ov it."

"Like what?"

"Your attitude. Clozes. Shoes. Hair. Valk. Talk. Smile. Everyzing must be taught to you immediately. Bevore breakvest starts."

"Which is?"

"One hour avay."

I deadpanned. "Where do we start?"

"Vink zee potion."

"Right." I pulled it out and downed it after looking at it nervously.

It smelled and tasted like sugar and spice with a sprinkle of a few nice things.

 **Well**. _Like chemical X._

 _Changed my Y to an X._

 **Ahahaha. I'll stop.**

I collapsed to the ground as my muscles rearranged and form became smaller, yet slimmer.

I closed my eyes and earned a soft kick to my side.

"Get up. Ve don't have all day."

I stood and groaned at my loose clothes.

"Put zis univorm on. And put zese heels on."

I did as I was told and struggled with the bra thing. And let's not forget how weird it was putting on panties.

 _Girls have so much to do. Goodness, and make up too!_

I watched the German French mixed girl curl my hair with a rod and then mumble a spell over the curl to make it last.

 **I think.**

Once she painted my fingernails after strapping on my heels, we started training.

"You've got to valk vith grace, zeduction, pover, and convidence. Like so-" She got up and changed her shoes to heels and walked quite similar to Aphrodite.

"Now you."

I got up and stumbled a little bit before I got the hang of it. "Like this?"

"That's good."

I smiled happily.

"Vhat is your name?"

"Uh... **Lily**."

"Hmmm. You'll ve my vestfriend. Okay?"

"Alright."

"Now let's head to breakfast, Lily."

"Okay."


	3. Chapter 3

We walked into the Great Hall with style.

People dropped food, jaws, forks, drinks, books, their common sense... etc. etc. I think you know what usually drops besides the beat.

 _Ooooooh_. **I did it again**.

I waved at Hermione and she ran towards me while screaming happily.

"My name's Lily." I whispered.

" **LILY! YOU LOOK AMAZING! YOU SHOULD FREAKING DRESS CUTE MORE OFTEN!** "

I blushed as everyone started whispering about me.

I adjusted my glasses and pulled away.

"Maria, you're brilliant."

" **At six**. It vill vall." she nodded before walking away.

I smiled after her and walked with Mione to the table. Ron and everyone got silent.

"I wish Harry wasn't so busy. He'd of loved to see you." Hermione chirped in.

"Oh." I nodded. "Hello Ronald."

Ron blushed. "Hi-Uh-."

"Lily." I nodded and shook his hand.

" _Your hands are so soft_... I mean nice to meet you Lily." he blushed a darker shade.

"Could you pass me a cinnamon roll, please?" I beamed, yanking my hand away.

"Oh. Okay."

Half of the table handed me one and I blushed furiously as I just grabbed one off of the tray that was closest.

"Thanks."

Everyone mumbled a welcome.

"Well I'm going to head to class early if that's fine with you."

"What's your first block?" Ron coughed quietly, ignoring the look his girlfriend was giving him.

"Transfiguration..."

"Oh. Brilliant. I have that class."

"Maybe I can turn into your boyfriend."

I froze up at Seamus's approaching form and watched Maria jump him with a wave of girls.

The professors didn't acknowledge his screams.

He was always a pervert and deserved every ounce of pain.

I walked away shaking my head and yelped when I ran into someone in the hall.

"Who the hell are you?"

"Goodness Malfoy. Are you always such a prick." I groaned rubbing my head. "I guess you have a thousand students to bully a day."

He yanked me up and examined me. " And what's that supposed to mean?"

"You don't even remember me since you bully so many people. Such as Potter."

"Potter is a rival. Not a victim."

"Then why did he come back to the commons crying?"

"..."

"Yeah. Okay." I yanked my wrist away from him and pushed him away. "Goodbye."

He appeared in front of me. "What's your name?"

"Lily."

His expression froze up before his gaze softened. "Middle name?"

"You don't need to know." I growled and stormed around him.

"Hey and Lily?"

"What?"

"You look better this way. I can actually remember you more."

"..." I flipped him off and sped away to class.

Once class started, Draco entered and forced a kid sitting next to me to move.

I growled and he chuckled.

" **Go**. **Away**. **You**. **Prick**." I breathed quietly.

" **No**. **Thank**. **You**."

I shot him a glare and he winked making me blush.

"So I want you all to embrace your spirit animal and write me a story with the person sitting to your right."

"Howdy partner." Seamus smirked.

"Maria!"

She came over and forced Seamus to swap seats with Draco before walking away.

"That's not what I-"

"Alright. Well my spirit animal is a snake."

"Really? I thought it was a ferret." Ron laughed.

Draco growled and I giggled.

"At least ferrets are cute. It's not like he was a centipede or spider."

Ron quickly nodded. "Right."

I returned my attention to the blonde. "Now. Our assignment. You're a snake and I'm an owl. So..."

"..."

"Maybe we could have it like...

 **It is said that in the woods of Death, only the good come out alive.**

 **A mother with two sons was dying, and she needed her sons to convince Death to let her live a little longer.**

 **If she died one of her children would get money and if she lived they had to take care of her for a hundred more years until Death tried again.**

 **So the two young men walked towards the woods with two different goals.**

 **One with the intention of begging and the other with the intention of slandering.**

 **So as they went into the woods they stumbled upon two paths.**

 **The left side had a path made of dust and sand and the other made of bones.**

 **The cruel brother poisons his brother's water and walks ahead.**

 **The stubborn man goes right on a trail without thinking, in the dark, without light and came out at the end in a pitch black cave.**

 **When he created light... He saw a giant serpent deep in slumber surrounded by gold.** "

I lifted up my quill and blushed when I noticed everyone was listening to me. Even McGonigal.

"I need your help now..." I dropped my gaze and bit my bottom lip.

Draco grabbed the piece of parchment and my quill.

"Uh... Okay. **So he stumbles upon a serpent who actually portrays death.**

 **He awoke Death and asked if his mother's time was up.**

 **Death was furious and said yes.**

 **So then the young man asked if his brother's time was up.**

 **He replied no and let out a tired sigh.**

 **He asked why he asked for those two people's life.**

 **And the brother lied, saying he was concerned for their health.**

 **Death eyed him before watching him leave. Afterwards he yanked forth an hourglass and waited a few minutes before dumping the sand of another's into it.**

 **Now for the other young man. He was tired and parched but forced himself to save it for later as he strolled down the path of dust.**

 **He came upon a giant owl and asked Death to please spare his mother.**

 **Death's giant yellow eyes scanned him before agreeing to letting her live if he agreed in shortening his life.**

 **The young man sighed and agreed.**

 **Death watched him for a minute longer before flying away.**

 **The young man walked away and headed back home to see his mother well but not his brother.**

 **His brother never did return.**

 **His poisoned body lied at the bottom of the path of bones.** "

I wrote our names in the corner and named our story while he finished up the end.

Everyone clapped as we turned it in.

Soon after they started working, McGonigal dismissed us early.

"So. You wanna go flying?"

"Uh... Maybe a round of Quiditch?"

"What? Quiditch? You don't know how to play."

"I practiced with our school's greatest seeker."

"If you say his name I **will** scream."

"I won't... but that's what he said, Ahaha." I laughed while his mind decoded the message.

"He does not make me- **stop it**."

"So are you in?"

"Sure, but you're gonna have to put some pants on."

"Now duh..."

"Fine. See you on the field in two minutes, princess."

"I hope you're ready to get beat by a pro."

He smirked and vanished.

"Stop breaking the rules Draco." I grunted. "You're supposed to use Floo power or walk." I frowned. "Bastard." I huffed under my breath.

I went inside an empty classroom and exhaled happily when Maria appeared with a Quiditch uniform.

"Here. You can have vat vroom leaning in vee corner... I have like ten ov em. Have vun!" she grinned before vanishing.

I slipped it on along with a pair of brown combat boots and grabbed the broom she had left me leaning against the door.

She has an Italian Horse Hair... **Oh.** **My. Gosh.**

Like the Nimbus 2000 is like the mustang but an Italian Horse Hair is like a frigging porche.

It was completely black, and unbelievably light.

 _Only royalty has access to this..._

 _And she has more than one._

 _Which can only mean one thing about my 'fairy godmother' Maria._

 **She's gonna be a Queen one day.**

I hopped onto her broom outside and zoomed forward faster than light.

It was easier standing on it and easier guiding it.

I watched Draco fly above me and quickly stop as his eyes landed on my broom.

" **HOW DID YOU GET AN ITALIAN HORSE HAIR!?** "

"I've got connections. Why? Jealous?"

"Very." he gaped. Is it lighter than a Nimbus 2000 or Fire Sphinx?"

"Surprisingly."

"Well let's play then." he smirked. "I'd love to see how fast it can go."

"Pfft. Release the snitch. First one to get it gives the other their pudding cup at lunch."

"Deal. But if I win you also have to sit next to me."

We shook hands and grinned.

"Go."

I zoomed past and dived down while looking.

He zipped left and flew past me. I watched the snitch drop and zip underneath him and grabbed it.

"Got it."

"Three rounds."

"Fine. You're only gonna lose, Malfoy."

He cocked an eyebrow. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

He flew towards me smirking deviously. "Go."

I dropped myself about three altitudes.

And gaped when he shouted he had it.

"Cheating isn't sexy."

"I'm not cheating." he flew upside down towards me and I rolled my eyes. "Awwww. You scared you gonna lose?"

"Malfoy. Start the game already."

He dropped the snitch and it went flying away.

"Lily~"

I deadpanned when he appeared in front of me with the snitch in his hand.

"Stupid cheater."

"I didn't cheat."

"And you made me miss two classes."

A bell echoed throughout the school. "And now it's lunch."

We landed our brooms and I waited outside of the Gryffindor locker area, while he put away the snitch.

His sweaty skin glistened in the sun, and his reddened cheeks were adorable.

 _Dang he's gorgeous._

I slipped inside my locker and put on the uniform Maria gave me earlier before coming back out to face the beautiful blonde.

"Ready for lunch?"

"You're staying in your uniform shirt?"

He stripped her shirt and threw me his uniform before putting on a white polo and his robe with his green and silver tie.

 **I SAW HIS ABS!** **SQUUUUEEEEEEEEEE!**

I felt my face scarlet.

"Why are you blushing?" he smirked.

"It's hot outside."

"Is it really?"

A cold breeze blew past us and I reddened. "Lunch. Right. Let's go."

"Haha."

"And take your jersey from me."

"Why don't you wear it."

"Because I don't wanna."

"Oh come on-"

"And you're a terrible seeker..." I grumbled.

"What was that?"

"I said it was sweaty and too green for me... er."

"Oh."

 **Phew. Close one.**


	4. Chapter 4

At lunch, Draco had me at the Slytherin table, so that **HE** could feed **ME** the pudding I had lost the privilege of eating due to my loss.

And to be honest this was a lot worst.

"Awww. Are you humiliated?"

"Why are you feeding me?" I glared.

"Because it's more torturous."

"I'll transfigure you into a Hippogriff once you unfreeze my arms and legs."

"..." He paled but forced himself to shrug so that he didn't appear to be as intimidated.

"Draco. Who is this girl?"

Draco shoved a spoon of pudding in my mouth and sighed.

"Lily."

"She's a Gryffindor." Pansy frowned.

"Yeah?" he glared up at her.

"I thought you hated them."

"I thought you were pregnant. Don't you have business to handle?"

I watched curiously.

Her eyes flashed to me and she started mouthing words. "Me and you will have a talk during dinner. You're gonna wish you never came to Hogwarts."

Draco snarled and she quickly scurried away.

 _He actually sounded like a lion... Which was kind of interesting._

 **Still hot.**

 _But still interesting._

I moved my head away from the oncoming spoon of pudding.

"So you two still dating?"

He eyed me for a moment. "No."

"She's pregnant by who?"

"She doesn't say... It's not me though."

"..."

"So..."

"Well, Uh- 4th period I have study hall. Would you like to join me?"

"Sure. If you don't turn me into a Hippogriff."

I laughed and he smiled. "Sure thing."

He shoved the spoon in my mouth. "Hmmm. Cute."

I blushed. "Shut up."

During study hall he studied for an exam while I leaned on his shoulder and went to sleep.

When I woke up it was four in the afternoon. I literally slept for four hours and Draco, who was on possibly his twentieth book looked at me.

"Malfoy, why didn't you wake me up?"

"You were tired."

I scowled before getting up and stretching. I sat back down next to him and leaned on his shoulder. "So? You should've woken me up."

"Dinner starts in an hour." he changed the subject.

"..." We stared into each others eyes.

He looked back at his book and I sighed.

 **Crap.** _I wasted time. I wasted too much time sleeping. Just as I thought I would._

I looked down at the arm around my waist and blushed as Draco kissed the back of my ear before whispering, "I'll wake you up in thirty minutes. Go back to sleep."

I leaned back and froze up when I saw the faint words on my arm, I will not tell a lie.

I pulled down my sleeves before closing my eyes again.

" **Lily.** Lily, babe. Wake up."

I opened my eyes and blushed at Draco and I's closeness. "Did you just call me babe?"

"I did. Don't think much of it." I dropped my gaze and he stood up. "Let's go."

I got up and walked with him to the Great Hall.

He grabbed my hand and squeezed it, filling my heart with hope of earning his love as we entered.

Everyone watched us head towards the Slytherin table.

We ate in silence for a while before he started talking to his friends, leaving me alone to battle my own flames, such as-

I got punched in the head and fell on the floor.

That same person started kicking me and stomping on me.

I pushed myself up off the floor and ran out of the great hall with the being right behind me.

" **BITCH COME BACK HERE!** "

Maria appeared in front of me. "Run to a bathroom. You have one minute."

I watched her grab Pansy and vanish and sighed.

But then I saw Draco and started running again.


	5. Chapter 5

_The potion was dropping._

"Wait!"

 **Take me when you are alone.**

I couldn't possibly let Draco see me like this. He'd kill me.

 **Then come on out a girl not boy.**

I bolted around the corner and hissed when my dainty feet enlarged in the tiny heels.

 **And hopefully you will use me right**.

I kicked them off and dived into moaning myrtle's restroom.

 **For only twelve hours can I bring your dream to light.**

A loud clock bell rung to announce it was six in the afternoon.

I locked the door and hid inside the first stall. I felt tears fall as I watched my muscles rearrange and my parts start to change and my uniform start to morph according to my gender.

The door clicked before opening. I bit my bottom lip as footsteps padded forward after a locking click filled the bathroom.

"Lily..."

"..."

"Alright...You don't wanna be called by your disguise?" the voice mumbled. " **Harry.** "

I was squatting on a toilet nervously. "..."

"I can go through each stall. That's fine."

I was in the bloody first stall.

The door was locked. _How bloody obvious?_

A shadow approached my door and the door rattled against the lock.

"Harry open the door."

I paled as an icy grey eye peered through the crack. "Go away."

"So I'm letting myself in?"

I cried harder. " **I SAID GO AWAY.** "

"Harry." he sighed. "Let me in."

"No."

"Don't make me crawl underneath the door."

"No."

"Fine."

"..." He crawled on the nasty floor and popped up in front of me. "Idiot. You made me get my robes dirty."

"I told you to go away."

"And I told you to let me in."

We started at each other in silence.

"Are you okay?" he examined me carefully while I shivered and cried quietly.

"I'm fine just bruised."

"..." he dropped his hand and stepped back.

"Why are you here? You don't like me this way..."

"Harry I never liked you. I might have flirted shamelessly with you as a girl, played with you even, but it was still you. You can't **NOT** be you. You're you."

"Then why'd you chase me here?"

"Because I wanted to know why you fell for a jerk like me?"

"Does love have to have reason?"

"Can you at least tell me when it all started?"

"I don't know Draco. It was before you tried to kill Dumbledore. It was before my name got drawn in the goblet of fire. It was way before when Lockhart became our teacher... I just kinda fell for you when I had my first wet dream... I didn't understand it... I liked it but realized that after a while they were wrong. They were impossible. And eventually my sweet dreams became loving nightmares. I wanted you but you hated me. You hated me so much that you saw fucking flames." my voice cracked as more tears fell down my face. "And I love you so much but I know you don't feel the same."

"What about the time when you used Sectumsempra?"

"I didn't know it was going to hurt you that bad..."

"What about Ginny? What was she?"

"She was a distraction. I kept trying to overcome my feelings and they only got worst."

"Harry... what do you want?"

I looked up at him and noticed he was crying slightly.

"I want you to be happy. Whether it's you loving me or you being happy with someone else."

"Stupid hero. You're fucking Harry Potter. When are you going to grow some bloody balls and be honest."

"..."

"If you want me then say it. If you want me to fuck you senseless then say it. Stop trying to sound all regal and humble. It makes me nauceous."

"I don't want you to do something you don't want." I sniffed and took my glasses off so that I could wipe away the continuous tears.

Draco stepped forward and snatched away my glasses.

"He-"

He lifted me up by my neck and slammed me into a stall door with one hand. "I want to do whatever it is you want."

I reddened as his lips pressed against mine gently.

For someone so rough yet arrogant, gentleness was at the bottom of the list on describing him.

Our lips slid against each other.

I pulled back and kissed him again and again and again and again. By the last kiss we had created a spit string between us.

"Give me back my glasses." I moaned as he started trailing kisses down my jaw. "I wanna see..."

He used his knee to support me and dropped his hand from my neck. "I only want you to feel."

Slowly his teeth sunk into my revealed skin while his hand slid underneath my shirt.

"Well at least put it in the case so it doesn't break."

"Where's the case."

"In my pocket."

His hand snaked down my chest and moved away. I could still feel his cold fingers brushing against my warm skin. "Oh..."

"What?"

I felt his hand grab my member through my pants and I hissed. "I said my pocket."

He squeezed and I closed my eyes. "I'm sorry... I thought this was the case."

I pulled him in for another kiss as he stroked me. I could feel the blood rushing. "It's not." his grip tightened and I felt my breath hitch.

Draco pressed himself closer against me and licked a bite mark he left. "Oh... Really?" his hand squeezed my butt and I reached into my robe pocket.

"You're a terrible seeker."

"And you're Hogwart's greatest."

"Here." I groaned giving him the case.

"Thank you." he placed a kiss on my cheek.

It was silent for a minute.

"What are you doing?"

I didn't get a response and seconds later the whole area was dark.

"Draco?" I whispered. I was all alone and vulnerable. Anything could happen.

I felt around in the darkness and crumpled to the floor in complete sadness. He ditched me.

I should've know he was just playing around. Tears fell down my face as each second passed.

"I'm so stupid."

A set of hands wrapped around my waist. "You really are."

I whimpered as he nibbled on my ear while another hand snuck up my shirt and pinched my nipple.

I arched into his touch but leaned back a little when he started sucking my neck again. "I thought you left..."

"I don't think I could leave a delicious treat alone without devouring it."

A yelp fell from my lips as he chomped my reddened skin.

"Oh." I blushed.

"I was expecting more interaction, Potter."

"What is this to you? A snotty comment filled sex scene?"

He froze as he started to unbutton my shirt. "This isn't sex."

"Then what is this?"

"Sarcastic love making."

"So you love me?" I raised an eyebrow.

"What do you think?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"Last time I checked you said you'd have to hate my guts if you ever got stuck in this predicament."

Draco's tongue slithered all over the buttons as he continued to unbutton my shirt. "I'm in this predicament now and hate is pretty far from how I'm feeling about you."

"..."

"And because you're acting so dumb I think I'll have to show you how I feel."

"Show me?"

The blonde pinned me down to the carpet and twirled his tongue around each rosey nipple, watching me curiously. I strained my eyes hard enough to see his deep grey eyes flicker baby blue in the candlelight. They were testing me. Challenging me. Mocking me. Almost.

I had dreamed of this day for so long. A moan filled the air as he moved to the other. The cold air caressed my skin while his warm mouth decorated me in welts and bite marks. I'd jerk around letting him grope freely, letting him pinch whatever, letting him touch anything he wished. It'll be over soon and that'll be it. My bottom lip was probably bleeding due to my attempt in holding back moans.

It was pointless. He'd already heard me quite a few times.

 _The pleasure was overwhelming._

His lips smeared and smothered the blood around roughly before his tongue lapped it up.

I thought he was going to pull away but instead he deepened the kiss. Draco had a fruity taste that was really addictive. I sucked his bottom lip and returned to nibbling. It was a tad tropical. _Mangos?_ I must have been pretty damn delicious since he kept trying to go on until our lungs shriveled up and crumbled.

I strained my eyes again. The taste of my blood drove him insane and the look in his almost silver eyes moaned that he wanted more. I was a bit uneasy when he bit my lip hard, but I couldn't get enough of him. **I wanted him.** _And if I wanted him... losing some blood shouldn't be so bad_.

Blondie pulled away and ripped his shirt off. The sound of a buckle being undone alerted me that the big moment was getting near.

His fingers started working on my belt and slowly he yanked my pants off and placed a kiss on my swollen lips.

Climbing on top of me, he began to grind against me slightly. My finger traced down his back. He jolted every other line traced. "I wish I could see you right now."

I took a deep inhale of his sweaty skin and reddened at the aroma of strawberry cake. He ignored me and ripped away my boxers.

The cold air attacked my bare form as I hardened. "Draco..."

"Would you like me to play with you, Harry?"

"I want you to."

His voice deepened. "What do you want me to do?"

"Touch me."

Draco grabbed me and slid his hand down before sliding back up. "Like that?"

"Draco- I-I need more..."

He squeezed me again before pulling away. "Well... How about this-" I sensed him stand up in front of me so I looked at his blurry form. "Pleasure me and I'll pleasure you."

"How do you like being pleased?" I blinked nervously. I'd never done anything like this before. In reality.

"Use your instinct."

"Instinct.." I mumbled.

 **In my dreams... I-**

I reached out blindly for Draco and grabbed his leg. I pressed my face against his inner thigh and licked the exposed skin. His pulse shook his body and his strength was slipping as my wet lips approached his member.

I closed my eyes and licked the tip. My tongue swept over the warm skin as I took more of him into my mouth. He tasted like soap and strawberry cake. I couldn't help but moan while forcing him down my throat. I swallowed a few times until he started groaning and squeezing my shoulders.

He wasn't standing anymore. He was laying on the floor with my head between his legs. My fingers rubbed his balls and squeezed his shaft. Pulling back, I ran my tongue between the slit before bobbing my head a few times and pulling up to look at Draco. "How do you feel?"

"Keep going."

I smiled and forced him back into my mouth. I could feel his fingers tickling my painfully hard member as I bobbed. He was thrusting in and out but he wouldn't release.

I felt his hardness, I could hear his desperate grunts as he neared but I could tell he was trying to last. He wanted to last. _I'm not sure why._

"Harry- Harry. Stop."

I kept bobbing though. I refused to let him refuse himself a release.

I wanted him to scream and twitch until he couldn't see anything but white.

"No. Harry. Please."

I could taste a bit of precum. It was vaguely salty but still sweet. The hot scent of sweat filled my nostrils as I pushed myself onwards. I wanted to taste that release. He was so bloody close.

"Harry-Harry! Wait. Stop." He pulled back and I leaned forward.

I pushed his hands back and moaned as he shook violently before oozing out some more precum.

 _Please release._

" **HARRY!** " He yanked my hair and I gagged while recoiling.

"Damn it! What?" I gasped.

"I'm sorry." he pulled me back towards him. "I didn't want to release yet."

"But I had you so close..."

"Here. Sit on my lap."

I crawled onto his lap and pressed myself flush against him. "Can I get my glasses now?"

"No." he muttered

I grinded against him and gasped. "I want it."

"Your glasses or me?"

"Both."

His hand squeezed me lightly. "You wanna take this to a bed, princess?"

"Princess?"

"I'm the Slytherin prince."

"I can't be the Gryffindor prince?"

"You're more of a princess."

"Riiiiight." I rolled my eyes.

"Idiot." he picked up bridal style. "I'm trying to make this comfortable for you." "

"I guess a bed would be nice." I sighed.

"Uh-huh."

I nuzzled into his chest and sighed. "..."

I wanted him to feel something but he still had his walls up. I knew this was just a hit and run. I could sense it.

He took a few wobbly steps before tossing me on his bed. "Get on your knees." he ordered as he dug in his nightstand for something.

I got on my knees and stuck my butt up in the air, parting my legs slightly.

"Nice asshole."

"It's extra virgin." I mocked and earned a spanking.

"Not for long."

"No?"

I turned and looked at him earning another smack on my buns. "No."

A squirting noise filled the sweaty silence and I yelped when something cold was smothered in between my crack. The noise was heard again and I felt a cold finger go in my butt and the other hand grab me from the base.

I hissed at the invasive coldness that slowly stretched me apart. But the faint massage that was hardening my throbbing member encouraged me to relax. "Dr-dr-"

"Shhh. Relax." he murmured, slipping in another finger. "You'll feel fine once you adjust."

I parted my legs further and twitched when he added two more fingers. "Eh..." I whined as he twisted them around slowly. Draco placed a kiss on my waist as he squeezed in his fist. A tear fell down my face at the reoccurring pinch of pain I was feeling. Stay strong. You wanted this. You asked for this.

"Does it hurt?"

"Just a little."

"Do you want me to stop?"

"N-no."

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine..."

"Do you think you're ready?"

I blinked slightly. "I think so."

He pulled away and placed a kiss on my back.

I sat down and turned to face where he was. "Glasses?"

"Harry it's completely dark in here. You won't see anything."

"But-"

"I said no." he snapped.

"Why are you so angry?" I huffed.

"..."

A sniffle filled the silence.

 _I felt hopeless. He was scared. This wasn't going to happen. I couldn't convince him. I didn't want to force him. He was vulnerable in the dark... and I wanted to see. I just-_

"Are you scared?"

I heard his voice crack. "No you idiot..."

I reached out for him in the darkness. His breath embraced my hand. _Just a little more..._ I caressed his tear stained cheeks and brushed my thumbs over his temples, tracing his features lovingly.

"It's okay to be vulnerable."

"I'm not vulnerable."

"I may not be able to see you... but I can sense the tension."

"..."

"You're forcing yourself."

"..."

"And if you're not doing this because you want to... or because you love me... I don't want this."

"..."

I felt my own tears fall. "I refuse to experience anything more." I pulled my hands away. "I don't want to hurt you or myself anymore."

"H-Harry. I want to do this."

I sniffed and wiped away my tears. "Then why are you scared?"

"I'm not scared."

" **YES YOU ARE!** "

" **NO I'M-** "

" **DON'T LIE TO ME!** "

I heard his voice crack as he started crying. "I'm scared because... this is the first time I've ever attempted to make love and I want it to be really special, and I'm fucking up everything, and I don't understand why you want me of all people, I- I think you deserve better." I watched his walls crumble without really seeing anything. "I don't want you to see me like this."

I grabbed him close and hugged him. "I want to see you like this, but hearing you will suffice until you choose to let me." I rubbed his back gently. "It's okay to be scared."

"I'm su-supposed to-to be stro-stronger than th-this." Shivers shook his sobbing form.

"There is strength in tears." I whispered.

"..."

"It comforts me knowing that you might actually feel something towards me."

"..."

"I can almost imagine how you look right now."

"I-"

"Shhh." I pressed a finger against his lips. "I don't want to see yet. I'd like to remain legally blind for the rest of the night." I smirked at the refreshing chuckle. "If anyone should feel scared it's me. I can't see and I'm on the bottom."

"You wouldn't be on top." he sniffed.

"And why is that?"

"You're more feminine than I am."

"Since when?"

"You listen to Hermione blabber on about girl problems."

"She's like a sister." I pouted at his response.

"And you respond."

"So?"

"AND you let her paint your nails a sparkly black because you thought it made your skin look great and brought out the green in your eyes."

"It did."

"Point proven."

"Nuh-Uh. You get mani-pedi-ies once a week."

He laughed through his sniffles. "The fact that you call my nail treatments that, proves my point even further."

I growled in frustration.

"There isn't anything wrong with being feminine."

"..."

"Harry."

I closed my eyes and turned away.

Draco tackled me into the pile of pillows. "You can't get mad at me now."

"..."

"Come on. At least look at me. Let me see those beautiful emeraldy blue eyes. Harry~"

My cheeks burned. "Shut up and fuck me already."

"Ah, ah, ah."

"What?" I opened my eyes and peered up in his direction.

"I want this to be special."

I blew a raspberry. "Alright."

"I'm serious." he murmured into my ear as he positioned me over his lap. "The first time is the most important."

He guided my hips downward. "Is it really?"

I felt him slide in and cried out in slight pain. Kisses decorated my back as he waited for me to adjust. Tears fell down my cheeks. "Shhhhh. Relax."

It was a lot to take in considering that he was hard.

I mumbled back a few responses to him as he tried to distract me with small waves of pleasure.

"How you feeling?"

"I'm fine."

"Harry?"

"Hm?"

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"Let me turn around so that I'm facing you."

"Alright."

I moved up slowly and repositioned myself before sliding back down. I cuddled into his chest as a groan fell from his lips.

"Can I move?"

"Whenever you're ready."

I whimpered.

"Harry."

I kissed him and gasped when he pulled out. I was pushed back onto the bed on my stomach and had my legs open for easy access to my butt.

Draco started to thrust slowly and I felt a tad uncomfortable by the faint increase of pain, but relaxed as mini waves of pleasure started to hit me. As minutes passed the waves got bigger, and I let out a happy moan into the dark green comforter.

"Harry get on your knees."

I forced my lower half up and moaned as a cold hand started to rub my shaft.

"Draaa-"

He squeezed before he started to jack me off. "Scream."

My blurry vision gained stars as Draco hit a spot a few times. "Wha- Hit there." I groaned. "I need you to hit-"

I shouted out and groaned as he hit the nerves again. "There?"

"There." I moaned as he hit it again a few times.

My body shook slightly as I started to build up and work my way to the edge.

"Draco..." I forced his name past a moan.

"Huh?"

"I think I'm gonna-"

"No." he took his hand away and I let out a hurt whine. "Don't- I'm so-"

"I want you to fill me with your seed, not decorate my sheets."

"But-" I groaned as my arms shook from supporting myself for so long.

"Don't make me rubberband you."

"Can you just hold me?"

He slammed the nerves again and I whimpered as my precum dripped down my legs.

"Harry... you're leaking..."

I squeezed my buttcheeks together and smirked at his loud moan.

"..."

"Harry..."

"I can't help but get turned on from your moaning." I teased as he moaned again.

"You're already tight enough..."

I squeezed again and blushed.

"I am?"

He grabbed my member again and rubberbanded my tip closed.

"Draco..." I groaned. "I need to. Please. I gotta..."

"This is going to make you so hard." he murmured before ramming himself in me until he rested on the nerves and was fully inside of me.

"What is?"

I moaned his name and collapsed on the sheets as a rush of warmness rapidly filled me.

"This."

I felt like my body was on fire and I just wanted to cool down.

Draco pulled out and laid back on the pillows.

"You're hard aren't you?"

"It takes a lot to take me over, but tonight it's all about you, so I'll wear someone else out another to satisfy myself."

"Someone else?"

"... Unless you actually wanna-"

I ignored the rest of his sentence and licked some of the cum off of his hard member while mine throbbed.

I placed a few kisses on his thighs before nipping at the leaking tip and massaging his shaft.

"Put me in..."

I deepthoated him and hummed for effect.

He cried out just before he released. "Harry! No-"

I happily swallowed and pulled back, licking my lips.

"Dork, you didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to taste you..."

"Really?" I nodded. "And how'd I taste?"

"Like frosting." I smirked and earned a kiss.

"Hmm."

"..."

I started to suck on him harder.

Draco hesitated on pulling me away as my tongue stroked him. "H-Harry..."

I pulled away making sure my tongue was sticking inside his leaking tip.

"Yes?"

"Merlin, you're sexy." he groaned as I swirled my tongue.

I crawled on top of him and slid myself down slowly on his errection.

He groaned as I finally reached the bottom. "Fill me Draco~"

I stroked my member with one hand and pinched my nipple with the other.

"Ah." I whimpered and bounced on him slightly. "Draco I want to feel you..."

His cold fingers stroked me as well. "You're so hard that your almost purple..."

"Draco... fill me." I whined as I got closer to the edge. "I want to feel it-"

Draco twitched and clawed on my sides as he released again.

My cock ached as my release got held back. Grunting I ignored the pain and squeezed it. "Again..."

"Harry..."

I rose myself up and back down on his still hard shaft a couple of times before feeling him fill me up a third time. I bet my member was a deep shade of violet from the rubberband, but right now my main priority was to finish Draco off.

I yelped when he sat up after pulling out of me and panted.

I listened to him breathe and grabbed his hand. Blindly, I watched him kiss my knuckles and smiled.

"Are you satisfied?"

"Completely... but I wanna do one more thing..."

"And what would that be, love."

"Can I release on you?"

"Why?"

"I just think you'd look better that way."

"Where you wanna put it?"

I felt his cum cover my chest and blushed. "There."

"Is it my turn?"

"Of course, Potter." he whispered.

I blinked. "So I... can ask you to relieve me?"

"Yes."

"Well can you relieve me, please?"

I felt the rubberband get removed and hissed as his cold, soft lip sit on my tip.

"Does that feel better?"

I whimpered and nodded.

I felt all of me go inside his mouth and slammed back into the headboard. "Draco..."

"I know."

I was so close. So close.

Until he pulled away and I whined. "Please don't do this! This is so unfair!"

The bed got lighter as Draco got up and walked somewhere. I sensed his presence returning, so I didn't announce my panic.

"Harry."

"Hm?"

"Close your eyes."

"But I'm blind..." (A/N: This line made me laugh for about an hour or two. XD)

"Close them."

I felt my glasses slide onto my face and smiled.

"Can I open my eyes?"

"Yeah."

My eyes opened to see the blonde in all of his glory. I kept my eyes on his and blushed.

His silvery blue eyes melted me.

"You can look down if you want Harry."

"Bu-" he kissed me and sucked on my bottom lip.

"You taste so sweet." he grumbled.

"..." My blush darkened.

He tilted my head down further and I gaped. "Look."

Draco's ego did represent something.

 _His name doesn't mean Dragon, for nothing._

"All of that went inside of me?"

"Yes." he laughed at my reddened cheeks. "It went into your mouth too. Which says a lot about you Potter."

"Hey!"

"Anyways. I gave you back your glasses so that I could torment you. Not so you can just drool over me without any expense."

"Oh. Sorry."

Draco licked me until I shook and precum started oozing again before rubberbanning me again. And just for sure torture he licked me a few more times before stepping back in the dim lighting.

The light from a few distant candles revealed to me the tube of something Draco had in his palm.

"What's that?"

"Lube."

"Which is..."

"It makes things easier when you're putting something big into a small hole."

My face was scarlet.

"And just to let you know, that was directed towards you."

I looked away. "Shut up."

"Hey." I turned back to him and earned a soft kiss. "Sit back against the headboard and don't move."

I sat back against the headboard and waited. "Like this?"

"Good boy."

He sat in front of me and propped legs up on my bent knees.

"Draco?"

"Shhh. Just watch."

He got some of the lube off of his palm with two fingers and massaged his entrance. Draco's moans made me shrivel in pain.

"It's too tight..." I whimpered in discomfort as Draco fondled himself. "Ugg... Draco."

"When I pull off the rubberband... I want you to slide into me, okay?"

"Yes, just-"

He removed rubberband and I pushed up his legs and slammed into him.

"Ah."

I closed my eyes and moaned from his clenching warm insides. "You feel wonderful."

I inhaled his scent and smiled. He still smelled like strawberry cake. "Harry... I need you to move."

I whimpered as Draco kissed me and started to move.

"You're so careful." he blushed and traced my scar.

"Would you prefer it differently?" I froze.

"N-no." His cheeks were a new shade of red. "I've never experienced it this way."

"What do you mean?"

He sighed and took a deep breath. "Kiss me."

I kissed him and frowned. "Draco."

"Can we talk about this after you release?"

I deadpanned. "But-"

He closed his eyes and pouted. "Please, Harry?"

I kissed him again before moving.

I smiled at the moans Draco were making.

I thought that my gentleness wouldn't have been appreciated.

 _But considering that he's had everything in life given rough, I think it's what he's always wanted._

" **HARRY-** "

I groaned and released just as he released hard on my stomach.

One time was enough for me to be satisfied, but Draco looked like he wanted a thousand more rounds, which due to my inexperience, was currently incapable of providing.

I tried to pull out but Draco wrapped his legs around me. "Harry..."

"What?"

"Don't pull out..."

"Well... I can't lay down comfortably on you."

"Then get me from behind."

I grumbled and repositioned ourselves so that I was still in him but hugging him from behind.

"So, you gonna tell me about what you meant earlier?"

I watched him stiffen. "..."

I kissed his shoulder as he started to cry quietly and small sobs shook his body. "Draco... please don't cry..." I whimpered and placed kisses on his spine.

"W-When I turned sixteen... M-my d-dad. He came up s-stairs and smiled at me. He said today was the big day. That he was proud of me." I listened quietly and squealed when Draco tightened around me.

"Ahhh. Draco... let me pull out..." I whined as I got hard again.

"No... I want to feel you again."

"At least finish the story first."

He sighed and continued his story. "So he told me to put on my best suit and to be ready to go to my initiation."

"For what?"

"My dark mark."

"..." My eyes flickered to the marking on his forearm.

"I didn't want to get it, but he said he'd be so proud of me. I didn't want it... but I soon realized that I didn't have a choice. Everything was planned out, accordingly."

"..."

"And during the ceremony You know who watched me with a weird look. I-I smiled at him just to remove all tensions and... when HE gave me the mark, he announced his intentions for the night."

My heart cracked as he started crying again.

"My father had never looked at me so disgusted before..."

"Draco." I whispered. "What happened?" _I could connect the dots, but I needed him to confirm it._

Each sob shook me and I pulled out. Draco cried even louder and I pulled closer to me. "Shhhh."

" **The Dark Lord raped me.** " he shrieked into my chest.

I showered him in kisses. "Shhh. Draco, calm down. Please."

"There was so much blood... I can still feel the cold cement... He was so rough... and vile... and-"

I stroked his back and squeezed his hand. "Shhhh."

"He wouldn't stop..." he sobbed. "He made me do things I wouldn't dare retell." Draco kept shouting out everything. He was like a dam that had just broke down and pouring out water, but in his case, his pain.

"..."

"He kept getting hard and huffing things in parseltongue for hours, Harry. For hours." he choked past a snuffy sob. "AND I BEGGED FOR HIM TO STOP... why wouldn't he stop?"

"Shhhh." I murmured and kissed his cheek.

"He's a sick bastard."

"I know."

"Sick." he spat bitterly as I brushed away his tears.

"He's dead." I whispered. "He's all gone."

"I-I know..." he sniffed.

 _This happened to him last year on his birthday._

"What about your parents? What did they do?"

"My father and my mother just pretend it never happened."

I kissed him on the lips a few more times until he was only hiccuping.

"Harry?"

I yawned.

"Yes?"

His arms wrapped around my waist. "You'll be here when I wake up... right?"

"Will you be here if I stay?"

"Yes."

"Then I'll be here." I got comfy and tried to fall asleep.

"Harry you aren't supposed to sleep with your glasses on." he scowled.

"Take them off of me then."

He took them off and placed them on the nightstand.

"Harry?"

"Hmm?"

"You're the best thing I ever had."

"Oh really?"

"Yes really."

I kissed his neck and laughed at his reflexive reaction. "So what are you implying?"

He shot me a playful glare. "That you're my girlfriend."

"Girl?"

"Ooops. Sorry. Could've sworn you were a girl a few hours ago."

I slapped his arm. "Yes, I'd love to be your boyfriend."

"Yay. Harry Potter is all mine."

"I love you, Malfoy."

"Call me Draco." I raise an eyebrow. "Malfoy stands for all Malfoys. Draco is just me."

"Dray."

"Meh. Whatever. As long as it doesn't get sparkly like Pansy's nickname for me."

"Aww. How come she gets to call you Dracie-poo and I get to call you only Dray?"

"Pansy doesn't have a functional brain when it comes to nicknames."

I rolled my eyes. He just called me smart. "Just tell me you love me, idiot."

"I love you too, Harry." he grinned and kissed my forehead.

I pulled away and laid down on the bed. "Goodnight."

Draco laid down next to me. "You wanna know a secret?"

"Sure."

"I've always been secretly gay."

I slapped his arm and shouted into my pillow. "You-"

"Owww."

 _I used the potion for absolutely nothing._

"..."

"Harry?"

I got up and pounced on him.


	6. Chapter 6

**The Next Day**

I was sore, bruised, marked, and swollen.

 _We both were._

"Good morning beautiful."

I growled at him and turned away as the daylight shining through the water that somehow managed to reach the window, dimly lit our room.

"Harry, you aren't mad are you?"

"Just a tiny bit."

His swollen lips pressed against the back of my neck.

"Well... if I'm allowed to say... last night was the best night of my entire life."

I smiled. "Mine too..."

 **THE END!**

 **(A/N): I hoped you enjoyed it! I own the plot, and few things through out the story such as the spell's poem, Maria, the death story, and my Italian horse hair & Spinx broom... you catch my point. No I don't own Harry Potter, but I hope to be as successful as J.K. Rowling one day. :) #Goals! I hope you enjoyed my story! Review! Fav! **

**Love you!  
**


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